Episode 31 - The Stage Where Everyone Quits (The Four Stages of Learning)

What if the frustration, self-doubt, and awkwardness you feel when learning something new isn’t a sign you’re failing—but proof that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be?

In this episode of Mormon to Muse, we explore The Four Stages of Learning and how this framework can help you understand your creative process, your healing journey, and your identity rebuilding after leaving a high-demand system like Mormonism. Whether you’re learning how to paint, how to feel your emotions, how to trust yourself, or how to live without external authority telling you what’s “right,” these stages explain why growth often feels uncomfortable—and why that discomfort is necessary.

In This Episode, We Explore: What the Four Stages of Learning are and how they show up in everyday life

Why unconscious incompetence can feel deceptively safe Why the second stage—conscious incompetence—is the hardest and most tempting place to quit How perfectionism and comparison keep us stuck

Why mastery is not a permanent destination but a moving relationship with growth How learning art mirrors emotional healing and identity reconstruction

The Four Stages of Learning: Uninformed Optimism – You don’t know what you don’t know

Informed Pessimism – You see the gap, and it feels uncomfortable

Informed Optimism  – You can do it, but it takes effort and attention

Mastery/Integration – The skill becomes integrated and embodied

This episode reframes frustration as information, not evidence that you’re “behind” or “not cut out for this.”

Why This Matters After Leaving Mormonism: Many women leave the church believing that if something is meant for them, it should feel easy or immediately clear. But learning—especially emotional and creative learning—doesn’t work that way. Understanding these stages helps you: Stop interpreting discomfort as disqualification Build self-trust instead of outsourcing authority Stay with yourself during the messy middle of growth.